Capture Your Grief - Day 6 & 7

Monday, October 07, 2013

Day 6: Ritual


While I don't have a particular ritual, I do make a point to take the day off each year when Josey's birthday comes around. I buy three cupcakes (next year I'll buy four), one for each of us in our little family. It's a way for us to recognize and remember our first born, to say she is our daughter and we'll never forget her.

Day 7: Me Now


It amazes me how much our lives have changed over the past three and a half years. I honestly forgot what it felt like to just live and be happy. While I may never experience a pregnancy again, I am a mom to a beautiful, royally-spoiled little girl. She makes our hearts smile. I am so thankful she found her way to us and we are forever grateful to her birthmother for choosing us to be her parents.

Of course, there are still those moments that sting. Every time I visit the cemetery I think to myself, "This time I won't cry," and inevitably, I cry. There are still those times I see a big baby bump and everything in me aches. Oh, and there are still times I find myself angry and bitter for the losses so many of us have endured. I don't think that ever goes away. The difference today, however, is I get to go home to sloppy kisses and the cutest little grin on the planet. :)

Carly Marie Project Heal | Capture Your Grief Photographic Challenge for Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month - October 2013

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