Capture Your Grief: Day 3

Thursday, October 03, 2013

Day 3: Myths #CaptureYourGrief

Day 3: Myths | The M HouseThere are so many myths surrounding grief. One of the biggest, in my opinion, is that time heals all wounds. For those who have never suffered the loss of a loved one (spouse, child, parent, etc.), it's easy to say we should move on or simply get over it. In some people's eyes we've had enough time to grieve. (As if grief is that cut and dry...)

The one thing time does do is allow us to come to terms with our loss. It teaches us to carry the weight of our grief. I found a perfect example somewhere on the web concerning living with grief. If you know who should get credit for this, please let me know.

Imagine yourself embarking on a weight training regimen. When you first begin, you can only lift a small amount of weights. However, each day you are able to lift more and more. There will be days that you may be tired or sick and you just can't lift as much as you usually do. There may even be days that you slip and drop your weights. Grief is the same way. You build up a tolerance, in a sense.

Now don't get me wrong. I'm not saying it's hopeless. I'm simply saying the hurt just doesn't disappear after a set amount of time. I can still see my sweet grandmother sitting in her favorite corner, pulling on her hair and talking about her son who was killed in a car wreck. Decades later you could still see the hurt in her eyes on those special occasions...his birthday, his death, the holidays.

So if you see someone years later still grieving their loss, don't judge them. We all slip from time to time. We all have our bad days. But, we'll get back up in the morning. Give us a hug. Say I love you. Just don't roll your eyes and tell us it's time to get over it. One day, that person will understand.

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1 comment

  1. I agree 100%. All time does is teach us to move forward - the pain and anguish of loss will always be there.