Monday, June 21, 2010
As if losing our daughter wasn't enough, there are some people in our lives that just don't get that our lives don't revolve around their's.  Ever since I came home from the hospital in April, a certain person who happens to be dealing with some big issues has poured all their troubles on DH. (I am using "their" so as not to reveal this person's identity. Yes, I know it's plural and as an English major it irritates me, but for the better good I will use their.) At first, they weren't so bad.  A sad phone call here and there.  But now, it's a phone call every hour and if we don't answer the phone, well, you can imagine. 

The problem here is DH and I need some space.  We have our own problems and need our time to grieve.  DH has been so wrapped up in this person's problems that he hasn't had the time he needs for himself.  Now, it's taking its toll on both of us.  Now, Mama Bear is MAD. DH is frustrated.  He doesn't want to hang his friend out to dry, but they are taking advantage of him. Maybe their problems are overshadowing the fact that DH has his own too.  I don't know.  All I know is it's got to stop. 

I've purposely avoided answering the telephone when they call.  At some point, if it doesn't stop, I'll have to have my say.  DH has tried, but they just ignore him and continue on and on with their sad story.  Well, we've got a sad story too.  So, you deal with yours and let us deal with ours. Geesh. There comes a time when we all have to take responsibility for our lives.  If we're going to find happiness or rather joy, then we have to take ownership.  We can't rely on someone else to give us that.  This person so needs to realize this.  DH can't fix their problems, only they can fix their problems.

Well, anyway, that's my rant for today.


  1. i'm so sorry. i'm praying that soon the relief will come and you will be able to grieve together.... other people can be so insensitive (though i try to give them the benefit of the doubt and hope that they don't mean to be, as i see you are also trying to do......)


  2. I have no patience with those kind of people. They would be long gone from my life. Have had some experience with those kind. You have to take care of yourselves, no one else will. I know, being older, I look at things differently, but sometimes these things cannot be tolerated. Love and prayers to you both.

  3. Your last paragraph? Amen, sister. Hugs.